Friday, September 18, 2009

21 guns

friday wraps up an pretty stressful week. hello to long weekend.
Job .career. I pretty like the way others look upon us. The new comers of the working world, fresh out of school, all so excited and ready for a brand new refreshing change. This excitment quickly fad into a sense of apprehension and sometimes self doubt as we grapple with the reality of the working world. The responsibilities that you shoulder and the amount of new changes and challenges ahead. No longer are you a student or an intern. Those seemed so far away and child's play. The things that you do in school, the stuff that got you through college with good results doesnt seem to work anymore.
"Your life, your career, you are in charge" . Suddenly we find ourselves out of the comfort zone and gone are the natural progressions that come with ease. The burden of seeking what you truly want in your job, of doing well in your job lies soley on you. Sometimes you dig deep into what you have got or what you think you have got to prove to the world out there you are capable. The self doubt comes in when everything you do seem so small and when expectations fall short. Expectations of others and yourself. Maybe it's all about taking things in stride, never giving up in your search to bring out the potential in you. The little pebbles or big boulders that get you down, they will make you stronger one day. Fear and setbacks are ever present in our lives. You Pick a fight and you fight to win. Sometimes we set too unrealistic goals that are doomed for failure right from the start.
This is nothing personal. And i am not refering to anyone per se. But i am just summing up what i am hearing from people around me. I am one of those, struggling to find what's my potential and dealing with setbacks. Such is life.

We had a two days career developement training over the past two days. I often find the most complex person to understand to be myself. During the class, we were suppose to identify our top 5 values. Reason being your values in your life kinda guide you towards the decisions you make. So mine was economic security, family happiness, achievement, health and personal development. I think before i try to understand others around me, i should take time to understand myself more. You know all those stuff about Myers Briggs indication. Johari windows. I think they kinda make things more complicated. Instead of understanding myself better, i m more confused. I prefer feedbacks. I was talking to the person next to me, in which we are suppose to find out more about the person based on random questions and then try to find out 3 values of that person. He couldnt, but what he wrote was pretty interesting : " Happy person, expressive and fast paced"
I never knew i came across as happy. And then, there was another sections on : "If i could lived my life again, i would..." I took up my pen and the words flowed. I never knew i had so many regrets in life and so many things i m grateful for. So i ended off with : " i would wish i never met XXX and YYY" Go figure XXX and YYY.
That aside. So much tv shows on cheating. Doesnt anyone realise things never become the same anymore when trust has been broken? You are a fool if you think you can pretend nothing happened. There's no such things as a second chance in everything you do. There's no such things as " it's a mistake. " It's over means it's over.

So much for a lighthearted post for a long weekend. Actually someone asked me why i blogged. Simple. i have no answer. It is just excuse for me not to read my book. :P

Do you know what's worth fighting for?
When it's not worth dying for?
Does it take your breath away
And you feel yourself suffocating?
Does the pain weigh out the pride?
And you look for a place to hide?
Did someone break your heart inside?
You're in ruins

1 comment:

lim said...

aww I love this song!