Wednesday, August 31, 2005

i love wed
bcos i haf test very wed. its like. wat can be more exciting then having weekly test to spice up my life. tests are juz wat i need.
i was joking.
friends commented. i look very relaxed when i m doing my test. bcos. i haf the time to take out my bottle n drink water. flip thru stuffs calmly. now. i dunno why. i just haf to drink water every test. i cant do a test without stopping to drink water. n while i m relaxed,it doesnt mean i know how to solve the problem. but one shd always b relaxed to be in the optimun condition to think. well.nicely said. deep inside. i m panicking like hell.

add that to the weird traits of kailing--drinking water during exams. and i do that veri often. even if i m running out of time.its like. i cant think without water.

aniway in engineering.its pretty sad when gals over-dress. the other day.this gal exposed her cleavage wif some bra to me. lucky fer the guy nxt to me.HAHA.
n theres this gal who actualli loook quite decent but her only fault was dressing too sparingly. halter. mini skirt. now this would be perfectly fine if she's in arts or wat. so that day where she wore a mini skirt. my class guys keep gawking at her. haha
sigh. no time. for friends. i hope u all understand. that all of u are important to me. but i juz wish i can haf the time to meet up.

Sunday, August 28, 2005

if u are in a relationship and u still find yourself checking out cute guys n hot babes, well u should make plans for a breakup soon.

if i see another of a distillation column tonight, i am so going to dream about myself in one.

sometimes its hard. to manage between sch and friends.
much as i wld like to meet up with them. i haf to bring myself to say no.
friendship.sch work.wats more mportant

oh ya dear aloy gg ns soon..i HOPE i can get to go out wif u guys... although i hate to say. i haf 2 tests nxt wk................haiz

and mr bird is flying back to michigan nxt wed. thanks fer coming to nus to meet me. bird. is gay. he looks at guys and try to introduce them to me. haha. BUT bird's taste in guy cannot make it. hahaha.
lab report freaking wasting time. 5hrs. wasted on some crap experiment. of manufacturing an acid in the form of CRYSTAL. crystal. crystal. i hate crystal. haha i mean the acid crystal.
equilibrium stage separation. sigh
stared fer 5-6 hrs. nothing can be done. i think i concentrate n stare so hard that i felt a wave of fatigue overcoming me at the end of some staring session.
i need a 24 hr full time genius tutor.

wat lies ahead..............................
a shroud of gloom

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

mid week
half dead.

sometimes u just need to open ur eyes. look around u. it really isnt that difficult to see. who is true to u. u know. sometimes i think cynicism gets e better of me. yet sometimes i cldnt help but feel this shallowness in pple.

no one's perfect in this world.

on e train. i saw this rather cute little boy. who was mute n deaf i think. n i couldnt help feeling sad n having this weird feeling. are we made to be the way we are for some special reasons?ok that sounds kinda like spiritual stuff. that aside, sometimes. we hanker for too many things in life,lament at our own imperfections. failures,worries and sadness. that we did not bother to take a look at people n things around us. if we did.maybe we will not take things for granted too much. or complain n whine at the slightest stuff like going to school. doing homework. having tests.

sometimes u just gotta take life as it is. but not for granted.
n accept ourselves and other for the way we are.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

heres a look at why i love pre-lab
The common definition of organic chemistry is “the study of compounds containing carbon”.
qn:Do u think there is a need to define organic chemistry differently?"

i dunno y they are asking question like that u know. i realli dun.

Friday, August 19, 2005

weekends are here.
time to do lots of catching up
life of a typical singaporean student is pretty sad isnt it
or mayb its me
feeling e strain
only two weeks into school

u know something is really not right
when
kailing
1)wants to sleep.
2)try to speak less than 10 sentence a day. put me in school. dun tok to me. and i can really pretty much juz get thru e day without talking to anyone. ya i dun initiate conversation. not even in msn.
3)and when she speaks. its pretty much incoherent n rubbish . very often.opposite to what she really means.
4)starts eating alot.
5)stone even when u r talking to her. yes thats rude.
6)is mean to evryone.
7)starts disappearing.

sigh. i need a break. the webcast are making me nauseous n disgusted.
i need people like sharon to be in sch with me. den maybe. i wun b so stone.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

haiz.
i love nus. especially cors. once again. cors never fail to waste my time. thanks alot.
i love CN 2122.2123.2121.
how can thinking abt fluids.those freaking long mathematical stuff. or flash separator n distillation gets me in a happy mood?not forgetting thermodynamic. bio here n there. i haf read the word DNA in 2 txtbk today alr. HELP.i dun even know if i am studying biochem or bio at one pt.
and the lectures all have this funny accent that feels rather unnatural.u know. how china people speak english. that after a while it feels like robot machine buzzing ard the ears.. n guess wat. my favorite lecturer now is a guy called far-rooq. no thats not e name of an iraqi terrorist. i love him bcos. he gives test every week. n i have no idea wt he is talking abt every lecture.

there's sthg wrong with me.
i m always feeling hungry.
haha

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

i realise. that while most people try to be nice to others. i strive to be mean to others. and while i always dun mean wat i say. i m still a meanie. AND kailing never like to show she likes someone .she's abnormal. n so. she's a terror to everyone. plus with my braces, call me JAWS.Terror jaws.
haiz
spent one afternoon(admist.drooling n falling asleep on e table) reading fluids. i dun really understood wat happened still.=/
e joy and fun of chem engine begins nxt wk.where tests n labs n tutorials all come in. =.=

wish me luck...

Sunday, August 14, 2005


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hehehe.crys. i m sorry. but i din pose the whole body one. are u please with me?



aniway thanks to the above person. n that thing in her hand. which comes with a video.i got to see how i swim.=)



and on the FATEFUL day of 13/8/05



DEVIL TEO n LOY ONG got together.



u see. this is devil. proposing n confessing her love to loyloy
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waiting fer an answer...............................................


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aloy(pump fist in the air)



YES!
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n so now. they r a couple.



 

Saturday, August 13, 2005

ha ok i m too lazy to post
a picture says a thousand words
but i can't exactly post the pic..cos. haha they are pictures of us in swim suits. for private eyes only.haa so msg me if u want the link. haha
thanks crys.for e house and the food.
the rest. fer the fun=)
love yer all.

haha i m sorry.to be late. i have this habit. of waking up 3o mins before sch/ any gathering. haha

Friday, August 12, 2005

in friends. u heard
"joey dun share food"
in kailing it is
"kailing dun wait for people"
haha. well at least not unless it is necessary

thanks. bird. for making me wait close to an hour. i deserved it. haha
yay.weekend. last time to slack. b4 tutorials n lab begins.probably last time i will see u guys till a long long time.
intresting talks wif friends today
cough* bird.eh save more $$.looking forward to my VIP table seat in 5 yrs time. =P

and talking to classmates today
the anology of a relationship as being somewhat like a train ride.
u know. sometimes the train breaks down. n u get to choose if u decide to continue to wait for it to function again.or decide to walk off the train and look for alternative path elsewhere.

n then. how letting someone slip pass u. or watching him/her in the arms of someone else before u had the chance to do/say anything as anologous to missing a train. u can never catch up with the person anymore. its almost like he/she has taken the train b4 u.with someone else. and all u can do. is to take the train behind and watch the lingering n fading shadow. unless. the train before u breaks down. and unless. he/she is willing to walk out of it.then maybe....u can catch up with her again.

flings.straying frm a relationship. as being stopping at stations here n there.
haha
like my anology?

and somehow. the higher hopes u place in something. the more disappointed u get in the end. its like. say in a relationship. u plan abt the future. which is gd n assuring since it means u see a future with that someone. but often.such relationship are also the most painful when it breaks down because u see ur dreams being shattered.

n how. its really true. that guys go for looks n figure more than girls.though maybe some may beg to differ.girls.go for more for security. how the guy treats them.
shallowness?or harsh reality?that we are in a world judged by appearances.self worth n wealth.

seriously.why do people get into relationship.
companionship? someone to share ur worries and happiness with? lust? cheap thrill? hope of finding ur future partner? possession?or wat.

haha ok enough.
lets tok abt.school.
been stoning n slacking this wk. tmr.last slacking day. then its time for me to get down to serious stuff nxt wk. n stop the waking up late antics. i have learnt that. if u think u are going to be late.well u r. no point rushing. u r still going to b late in the end. haaha.
the lt at nus are realli uncomfortable,the table are ridiculously small n the seats old n uncomfortable.

n maybe. my EQ level is really not as high as i thought. i dun restrain myself from showing dislike or displeasure in someone or something. but m in a better mood alr. thanks to friends ard me.who withstand my moodiness n bothered to listen to my whinings. it was a mixture of uni blues. self-exaggeration of a problem. well.mood swings. typical of girls. but i guess.its really not easy to find someone who can stand me.
why today is not my day
1)i woke up at 730. when class starts at 8.well at least i woke up. the alarm din ring.
2)i tried to speed. there were massive jams
3)i spent 144 on textbooks. making the total damage a total of 264 dollars.
4)i tripped n broke my sandals. the strap Broke.luckily. i din fall flat. but this guy was smirking.
well. maybe the books were too heavy la.the CG abit lowered. n now. i haf friends saying i look fragilelike i'm gonna break soon.gawd. FRAGILE.YUCK.so not me.=(

&
in view of the massive amount of money i have invested in books. i have now being reduced to living on bread n water fer the rest of the month, taking public transport. mending my broken sandals wif stapler. haha.
ok e stapler part was crap.


haiz.
sometimes i wish there were some girl-friends whom i can hang around wif in school.
in chem engine. i feel like i m surrounded by guys.
haiz.

Thursday, August 11, 2005

the good news is tomorrow is friday
tha bad news is. it marks the end of wk 1 of sch. which is suppose to b slack since tutorials hasnt start.
actually i have no idea wats driving me nuts n cranky these days maybe school?disgusting lectures? or maybe its some unfathomable feelings. i get irritated easily. i start seeing the worse in people.
and so. i decided to run.escape. haha. dig another hole and then jump in. p.s.crys where's e hole u dug.
spent a bomb buying tons of textbk that i have no idea wat i m reading.
fell alseep juz reading organic chem notes during break today. luckily.when i woke up. there were no wet patches on my notes.n luckily. i was alone.
but at least..my books r giving me gd night sleeps these days.
n after sch. i stoned. stoned. n stoned somewhere out there.
u know. sometimes being alone really isnt such a bad thing.
and sentosa on sat? not really in e mood to do anything. maybe i can really go there. find a spot. dig a whole in e sand. bury myself.

ya.get a life.kailing. stop acting like the world has ended.
juz because school has started.
n so to the friends n the one i love.
u dun deserve this crap frm kailing.
so just let me finish my mourning abt sch. n den start my mugger mood.

haha.

Monday, August 08, 2005

Excting 1st day of school.
had a wonderful lecture of Fluids MEchanics. which was a blur and whirlpool of mathematical formula.and which kailing e great had a hard time comprehending.
after that
went to computer centre. and spent 1hr. 30 dollars priniting my notes fer the entire sem.only about 5 people stared daggers at kailing bcos the amount of notes she sent fer printing were gargantum and that kept them in e queue fer quite some time.but cheapo kailing wanted to save $.printing notes in sch is so much cheaper then at home.so she gladly tolerated the stare of those pple. haha.

den went to co-op to buy textbk n laptop bag.
co-op was a frenzy of mess as there are tons of pple jostling n eagerly buying textbks.
spent 40 bucks on the fluid mechanics bk.
30 bucks on a cheapo laptop bag.

bleah
tiring tiring day
now back to my magiee mee. haha. see. i m so mugger. i sacrifice lunch time fer printin notes.
and den time to read my newly bought txtbk of fluid mechanic. =P

Sunday, August 07, 2005

ok. sch's has offically started
in a way. its good.no more wasting time on brainless stuff. maybe life will be more fulfilling n less empty then.although its one hell of a sem. i wil make it through. i m kailing the great.
okie. wun b blogging so much animore.will b spending my time wilth all my textbooks

happy schooling all nus peeps

p.s:crys, one dollar pls? i funding ur bikini ;P
today
as i was reading the straits times. it dawned upon me that my usual sunday habit of reading the 'Whats on Tv ' for the week has to changed because there will be no more tv time next week anymore. =(
and then. i used to think that in life. i would marry a person for love.
but it also dawned upon me as i was reading the article about how women wouldnt marry guys in unglam jobs like that of a karang guni man etc.that actually.no i wouldnt marry someone in unglam jobs too.maybe love really isnt everything.

haiz.
m feeeling terribly utterly bad over something and someone.=/

Saturday, August 06, 2005

ironically after i put on braces. i actually talk more then usual.
mayb its because fer e past few week when i had my extraction n putting of braces ,i din get to talk much .n so now i m kinda making up for it.
oh well. guess frm now on. its back to stone kailing
sch's starting
back to serious business.
frm mon onwards. no gb. limited msn n blogging.no clowning around.

when i first watched LOST. my first question was. how are they gonna end the season
juz as i haf expected. the finale wasnt realli a gd one. maybe because it wasnt much of an ending becose there will b more seasons coming.but honestly. a plot n story like that. it really isnt easy to have a kid of ending everyone like.

m having a bad night. feeling e stress of school.playing badly in gb.
1am. i dun want to sleep.although i m very very tired. must be the effect of the sun yesterday. gawd. i m weak.
these days. i find myself. liking to look at little kids.
today on e train.
this kid was staring at me/. n i was staring at him
actualli he was playing this game with his little sis.which requires them to shout "10...9...5..4....1.blast off!"
and he kept staring at me.so i smiled back. i think he kinda mistook it as a gesture of approval bcos the very nxt second he goes throught that whole blast off thing at e top of his voice.
and then. later . i saw this cute gal.wif a mushroom head.n my mum sed she looked like me when i was a kid.
well.at least. now i know. i used to b cute. haha

and i feel. i haf juz made something worse.
its almost as if. i haf dug a hole deeper fer myself.
and now. i dunno how to get out.
haiz.vexed.=(

Friday, August 05, 2005

m sunburnt.tired.missing one contact lens
these days/ feeling quite hyper active. maybe its e pre-uni burst of energy
went sch again.played captain's ball.terrorised some freshies. =P
ok la. long time since i do sports in e sun. so i m not complaining.e last time i went morning trg was hmm j1?
but like dat means my skin has aged....haha
after dat. ktv. ktv is just not my kinda thing la hur.its something i will nvr be active abt. i'll rather haf a 1500m swimming sessiom.haha.but was ok la. juz listening to pple sing their heart out. but all the songs they sung. i kinda was hearing them fer e 1st time.

one weekend
more self amusement. n hyperactive-ness.
haha

Thursday, August 04, 2005

n once again. i extend my apologies.to samuel bird kwek. fer making u wait half an hour. i m sorry.

haha i tink. i m finally putting on weight.
went sch to look at yr one orienatation today.
kinda pitied e yr 1. having to be enthusiastic.despite e not so exciting games.
well.at least i got free food. cos they played some games. similar to some chi variety show. n only the gals could eat. egg prata.grilled chicken.ice tea.apple juice. sadly. there were onli 3 gals left. but.we fed e guys with the food secretly when the councillors werent looking. hehe. gawd. i may want to gain weight.but i dunno to b a fat pig
haha e class guys went a bit gaga over the veri limited gal freshies ;)
ooh fierce fight.
ok la. i also saw some cute guys today;P
n kena suaned a thousands time abt my braces, haha. but it was quite funny. and right now.i m pretty neutral n oblivious to this thing.
tired.though i slacked. haha.
zzz

sigh. i m still sad. thats sch's starting.
sometimes
i wish i dun haf to dissappoint anione. or to let anyone down.
its realli not a gd feelingl to see someone sad or hurt.
i realli dunno how to describe this feeling.=(
someone. gif me a hole to hide?

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

ok i m pissed
i sat in front of my com frm 12-5
looking at bidding
i dun understand.
y need close n open bidding
like dat veri fun meh
its brainless. stupid. a waste of time.
i juz hope i get my module=(


are u the kind of person
who worries abt meeting new pple?
u know. say u enter a new sch.new class.
well. haha funny thing is i never can b bothered
the pt is. dun try too hard. be urself. u may not b well liked. but at least u r not well hated.
and i actualli find joining orienations duh. i mean its ok if u an OGL or wat. bcos u dun haf to realli particpate.but as a participant. eee. i find it ..bleah
i mean. haf u seen those on type who cheer dam loud. are dam spontaneous. no offence la hur.
mut b onz n spontaneous during orienation. cannot act like a spoilsport also
n so what if u all are veri close. pple goes like"i like my og. they are so nice. we are veri close. we hang out together"
but at the end of say 1 mth or so. everything kinda breaks down. the og pple dun even keep in contact animore.
haha i know i m freaking cynical la hur.
but i m freaking pissed by bidding now
dat i m
going against the world n everyone else again as usual
so no offence to those
who haf joined orientation n liked it.
its a good start to sch.
i m prob the onli one.who sees things that way.
haiz.
annoying.cors. i hate u. i really do.

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

as usual.
i wld like to say
nus shd do something abt the cors server.
to prevent jam during open n close bidding
u know.
thousands of pple are camping in front of their com.u need to cater to everyone.
or mayb i shd get those hyper super powerful com. will it help? ha i dun think so
bcos
i haf been here. for one hour. trying to log in.

dam. i can nvr resist a sale.
but i dun care
its my last week to shop.

after tat.i'll bid shopping malls a farewell till december=)
how u know.u are suffering from pre-uni-syndrome
1) u get depressed abt sch. the slightest mention of sch irks u
2) e pple in school dun interest u. u get irritated juz seeing innocent yr1 doing flag day
3)u start spending alot
4)u start to go against everyone. kids. family. friends
5)u start talking nonsense. babbling. whining. being sarcastic.
WELL. thats me. by e way.
i haf decided to stop being so childish.
n face the reality.that sch's starting. no more bumming ard. wasting time n youth like that.waking up at 1130.watching bimbo shows. wandering ard wasting time.
time to get down to do important stuff=)
and in e meantime enjoy my remaining days of hols.n stop acting like a kiddish freak=P

anyway.
juz bcos u are old or a kid doesnt mean u can be rude.or have things ur way.
i mean. today. mrt. thsi old man juz pushed me away to enter the train. a long time ago.i itnk i haf mentioned b4. there was once this old lady knocked on me while i was asleep on e train n made me gif up my seat.
gawd. i honestly was sound asleep n din see her. n its freaking rude. little gal also tired. i wld haf given up the seat to her if i had seen her.n may i emphasize that it is not an obligation or a must to gif up one' seat.
but dun bother fighting with kids or old pple. whatever happen. u will b the one in e wrong. i mean. ok. its not like it nvr happen to me b4. kids run n knock into me. fall down. cry. everyone stare at me.like i m some bully.

and actualli.
i dun fancy gd looking pple.
i lke those. with a style of their own.who dun try too hard to look gd.

Monday, August 01, 2005

went to sch fer an useless session of talk. its not as if i dunno i must start planning wat i want to do in the course.with my life.
ya. i m utterly disgusted wif sch. am in a lousy mood.
n then during the talk
it says. some employer find graduates . having some kind of shallow behavioural aspects.
how true.
or mayb its juz people on the whole.me n u inclusive.

some people try too hard. to b nice. to b funny.to b outstanding from e crowd.
i dunno.going to sch.seeing all e people again after so long. gives me a weird feeling. i feel like i m in a wrong place.everything and people ard me. juz dun feel right.or mayb its juzt sch.or mayb its juz pms(POST menstrual tension').
haha.pui.

anyway
i got bullied by a little boy that dat.or rather me n my mum
when we were queuing up to pay fer stuff.this little boy wif his mum came up frm behind n insist that he was there first.
well. 1st of all. i din see anione there. netiher did my mum.i mean. gawd damnit. his mum is pretty FAT n there is no way we can miss her n the boy. i m not blind. i m not. i m veri awake then. u werent there. and it dun count if u were there but went away. how m i suppose to know u were there in e queue n went away.
now. well m i relegating myself to a kid.bleah
well.but being a nice gal.being a strong believer that kids dun lie.kailing gladly let him go 1st.
but kids shdnt lie u know. no one likes a liar.


bidding has started fer me
who cares.
i m going MIA the nxt few days. roan the street.waste my time as much as i want
n den run off to the jungle in msia.

i m alone tonight.at least till 10 b4 my parents come home
i like it.