hahaz.unglam photos war? 

i really hate this blog sometimes
it just serves to remind me of the times i felt bad n wrote unkind stuffs
and how i contradict myself again n again

like if i don't care i wouldnt b feeling this bad right?
so anyway it all boils down to learning to keep one's cool n emotions under control.
thats y i always think people like me should just stick with the wall.well at least the wall wont be angry if i want to bang my head against it. and i can scold the wall for all i like.
haa i am not making any sense simply because i am mentally drained. have not been really been sleeping well.yesterday when i closed my eyes. my mind filled itself with equations. from calculating some mass flux, the equations became some hybrid and agglomerate of rubbish transfer functions and equations on how long it takes to sleep. and then today i tried to scare my mum after i accidentally cut my knee. it wasnt a bad cut but she fussed over it. but i felt pretty sadist just staring at the cut n waiting for it to bleed...and henceforth no skirt(no bom bom thighs,haha) fer the week cos she poured some medicine over it. u know those yellow lotion blue lotion kinda stuff. pretty ugly. plus the cut itself.double yucky.
haha but all is fine .. i am not going bonkus. haha.just bleah. bland life n mugging period right now. makes me a dull and easily irritable person

just one word to desribe how i feel-->disgusted

i have seen the worst in things n people

Solitude is a freedom

and i shall not give any damn about anyone or anything from now onwards.

nothing is real in this world

why should i care
seriously why should i?

pple ard me turning 21
happy bday xm
crap.i cant believe i m gonna b 21 this year. i dont feel like i m that old. i still feel like i m 16. haha
but anyway i rule out possibility of any celebration
simply because. i have been skipping so many pple's birthday celebration,chalet.party etc
that i think as karma would have it. when i invite them they will go mia as well
haha


anyway
i m back at square one
feeling low down abt stuffs. no not him
i m just a little stressed by sch, weary abt stuffs
bleah

n i have infected an unfortunate friend of mine with this stoni-ness.haha
its just some kind of disease. u go around. staring into space. n a general apathy towards stuufs around

i think i m realli easily irritable these days
i attribute this to the fact that
every morning i get woken up thrice by 3 different alarms, at 7.30 8.30 n 9
n the reason why i am still allowing them to ring
is because i have no idea where those alarms are.
well at least in this way i will never b late for school

today on national geographic, they were showing crocodiles digging holes.
i want to dig a hole to hide too.

i went to sch late
cos i was home watching national geographic on penguines
i hate labs involving chemicals
5hrs of lab with toxic chemicals of horrendous smell aint fun.seriously

u know how sometimes
on mrt trains or bus u see someone u know. but don't want to talk to him/her lest there will b much awkwardness. n detest the thought of having to find some topics to talk abt
well it happenns to me before. or rather it always happen to me .today the actor n actress were a guy called BIG Q and a gal called little crys.
ha anyway to avoid having to talk to the person. u could
1) well PRETEND to be deeply engross with ur tutorials
2) u know she is goonna get off at the same stop. u know she is gonna take e same bus as u later on. so before the mrt reaches the stop. u walk away as far as possible first
3)of cos. act blur la. if suay suay she comes to talk to u. u say: oh i din recognise u so i din dare say hi.well. at least thats wat i said last time.
crys*cough.crys*cough.hahahaha

my unglam moment today
i tripped over e stairs n fell. *gasp*

met the girls for a quick lunch today.sharon is happily in love. ta da da da wee. haha
well
had to abandon them while they were deeply engrossed with this turn turn machine
nevertheless was great seeing them all again
and making plans for e hols
but till then. sighz. never ending work.

anyway to add to my list of annoying pple
---gals who hog the dressing room. so the sign says. max 3 piece allowed. so they take in 3 la. ya. den after parading fer some 5-10 min. they decide.uh oh dun fit ah. so they send the boyfriend to take the other sizez. meanwhile they continue parading in front of the mirror. and so some cow years later the guy returns with the other size. n this thing goes on for a few more cycle as she parades in n out with that stupid guy there taking sizes fer her.just buy it la. n parade at home with him. =.=
i m sorry but i m highly irritable these days. sighz

haven realllllli been blogging because i just don't have anything to blog abt
life's just like that
everyday i go sch. come home.do tutorial, sleep.thats all. nothing else. eat sleep study.
just that these days
there had been a few moments where i feel like tearing my tuorials n notes n textbk up
and also
my appetite is growing
seriously. why bother going on diet.eating is an enjoyment. sounds bad huh. like i m heading towards the path of being a fatty bombom.
happy weekend everyone
i'll be enjoying myself too
with 1 lab report.2-3 assignemenr. 4 to 5 tutorials. WEE!!! happy!! =/

i read with disgust abt a man who tortures cats by pressing at their eyes n hitting their heads till e eyes n nose started bleeding
well at least he went to jail

hate fags.freeloader.dsilike alot of irritating pple.e way they do stuffs.
i dunno y these days i find some pple a major turn off.

its funny how much i shop
yet i seriously cant find stuffs to wear. i m sick of my old dressing style n clothes
but am too lazy to revamp my wardrobe
n den there is no need to dress up in engineering anyway
and pple like me shd just wear hideous clothes \to make myself more hideous.

little things ,people n stuff that turn me off
1)well needless to say bloody- taxi drivers
2) bitting on an existing ulcer
3)well bloody braces.haha its like once i bang into a wall.i get ulcers. hmmm although why is it i keep banging into walls n cupboards n stuff is still an enigma
4)pple who tries too hard,who are just too un-real .some act cute.some act chio.some act cool
5)pple with bad breath. who yawn and open their mouth at u. try the mrt train with some old uncle in e morning. wa. can die. n can u imagine kissing someone with bad breath? if i have,tell me. i swear i will go to the dentist immediately.period.
6) knocking into stuufs.see 3.
7)gossips.malices. talking behing pple bad.though i m guilty of it. but. sumtimes. one should know e limits .u know some pple hee hee haha in front of u. den condemn u behind ur back. at least if i dun like a person. i dun put on a facade. i will show that i dun like them.
8) being interrupted when i m in e midst of studying. i swear i will throw my book at u. u see. i think i m getting violent. cannot cannot. must b more girly..hee hee hee.(ya right)

9)typing a long posts n losing it. i hope this doesnt happen today

well a bad day
was disturbed by the loud noise that came from downstairs.............i swear i would throw a bomn down if i had one
well. tryied blogging. typed a longlong post n then i lost it
so i m not gonna do it again


this funny johari thing seems to b e in thing now
http://kevan.org/johari?name=tappy

the thing i hate abt people is that they dun have a style of dressing on their own
n the thing i hate most
is that people tell me.. oh go n follow xxx's style
u know what. i feel DISGUSTED n INSULTED
i think i am who i am
and if u like xxx's style so much
u are welcome to worship or embrace xxx
i don't need to be a clone or a faggot living in someone's else shadow

and 4 days later
i am still that stone
games.guys.shopping.clothes.food.sleep. tv.
are still unappealing to me.
*bang head*


que sera sera

bleah

wee!!! blogger Is so Great!! they restored my deleted blog
just a few weeks ago i deleted my blog on impulse. lost all my old posts n entries and was feeling a little sad
so evryone.choose blogger. they r good. haha

ok now that i haf my old blog....so i m thinking
shd i blog here or at my new blog

haha
maybe i'll talk abt less private stuff here n penn my weird thoughts at my secret blog. haaaa oh no
where shd i blog
aniway i dun haf time to blog aniway
so i guess. i will blog here sumtimes
n when i feel like scolding pple or when i start being depress.i'll do it at the other one.
bleah

aniway
i m just happy i got all my posts back=)
u know in case when i go to tibet to meditate nxt time i can check back at my life now

well i m still alive
going thur the same crap of chem eng

hhh